blue notes on physique

Late afternoon early evening, I'm sorry I allowed myself to conk out, I should push through the barrier of tiredness, with something lightly physical, even a walk, I know when I'm in those states I'm no good for reading or mental work, but at least I managed many of the tasks I set for myself today - paid the fine, deposited the money order, obtained the bank signatory papers, collected the computer, sat in on an Anglicare meeting. Still a few things to do, and I'll do them. Yet still I feel in crisis. Bushwalked yesterday at Morialta, which was all to the good, but did it, as with everything, alone. Comparing myself with other physical specimens, wow look at that one, he must work out regularly, god I’m glad I don’t have a gut like that one, or do I? No no of course not, but my arms are so weak... A woman walks in front of me carrying a writhing toddler at her hip, and I know how hot n heavy that is, and my arms are soft as butter.