a reckoning in a small room

It’s always been a fave daydream of mine, of waking up and finding myself in a small room with one other person, and no escape. A smaller and more claustrophobic version of the Big Brother house. Of course in my younger days that other would be some woman I had the hots for, who would only notice me if there was nobody else to notice, but it would also quite often be someone I was in dispute with, someone I wanted to have it out with to the bitter end. Who would be the strongest, intellectually, emotionally and all the rest?
Today it’s George Pell, arch-conservative archbishop in the cult of Catholicism here in Oz. He’s been getting TV time lately, not surprisingly, and George Negus today said to him – ‘You know John Paul 11 was such a charismatic, larger-than-life figure, don’t you think the Catholic Church might need to take the path of reform in order to maintain its popularity now that he’s gone?’
Pell’s response was something like, ‘Oh no, because the Church will never be able to abandon the gospels…’
I switched off then, being insufficiently interested in Pell’s idea of the gospels or of revealed truth or whatever, and having no confidence that Negus would be able to put him on the spot, but Pell’s smug response bothered me, and the idea of being locked in a room with the wanker began to exert its appeal.
Moi: You believe that any reforming of the church will entail abandoning the gospels?
Georgie: There’s a chance of that, yes. The church is built upon the gospel of our lord, and that’s a strong foundation indeed. That foundation must be kept intact at all costs. We’re not about to water down holy writ in a bid for converts.
Moi: I understand, but the difficulty I have is that I hear theologists and religious thinkers of all persuasions, from the most conservative to the most liberal, all claiming that their view of their church (whether catholic or lutheran or whatever) is backed up to the hilt by scripture, by the gospels. Now, I’m no bible scholar, but since these debates have been going on in the various churches for centuries, it seems reasonable to assume that the gospels are open to a wide range of interpretations, no?
Georgie: No that isn’t so, the gospels are quite clear on virtually all issues of moral significance…
Moi: Yes, that’s what they all say, but it seems to me that these clear and well lit paths to virtue and salvation are leading many of the faithful in quite opposed directions. Are you saying that your interpretation of the gospel is right and everyone else is wrong?
Georgie: What I’m saying is that the church’s understanding of the gospels – and I say understanding rather than interpretation, which is a loose word – the catholic church’s understanding of the gospels is pretty well spot on. If I didn’t think that I wouldn’t be a catholic, much less an archbishop.
Moi: So you must presumably think that the other christian denominations are wrong in their interpretation of, or understanding of, scripture?
Georgie: Well, not necessarily, but I can’t speak for other denominations. I can only speak for the catholic church.
Moi: The true church?
Georgie: My church.
Moi: And why is the catholic church your church? Did you choose it rationally out of all the available denominations, out of all the various religions indeed, or was it a matter of the peculiar circumstances and influences in your life?
Georgie: I’ve been a lifelong catholic.
Moi: You were educated in catholic schools, weren’t you?
Georgie: I was
Moi: So you never got much chance to think differently. It was quite literally a cloistered upbringing…
Georgie: No it wasn’t cloistered at all, I was given a very good all-round classical education, not just a religious education, and I’m very grateful for that. I wouldn’t have gotten where I am today without that start in life.
And so on. It’s bit hard putting words into the mouth of a real person, especially one whose views you so strongly disagree with. You want to expose him, but you want to be true to the character, and he’s capable enough of putting his own words in his mouth. So I suppose I should leave him be. Still, I wonder, what would happen in that small room, with him no longer shored up by institutional power, just an ordinary guy whose views are no more sacred than anyone else’s. I’d just love to have a go.